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Gailey's first speech should have been


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The movie Major League was showing on Comedy Central and I couldn't help thinking maybe the speech the manager gave could have inspired this group.

"I'm not much for giving inspirational addresses, but I'd just like to point out that every newspaper in the country has picked us to finish last. The local press seems to think that we'd save everyone the time and trouble if we just went out and shot ourselves. Me, I'm for wasting sportswriters' time. So I figured we ought to hang around for a while and see if we can give 'em all a nice big @#$%burger to eat!"

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