Emotional attachment to Bills - perspective welcomed

[BuffaloBill]

10 hours ago, Rockee96 said:

Hi,

 

I am a 39-year old from California who has been a die-hard Bills fan for the past 30 years. It all started when my mother bought me a Thurman Thomas rookie card for my 9th birthday in 1990. I started watching Bills games rooting for Thurman because I wanted the value of the card to go up. The rest is history, as I fell in love with the team, witnessed Wide Right, the Super Bowls, the heartbreak of Music City Miracle, short-lived joys, and long-suffering during the past 3 decades. I've flown to Buffalo from Cali to watch Bills home games only to see them lose over and over until I finally witnessed a win in 2018 (when Josh beat the Titans). I've met great friends during the tailgates who welcomed me with open arms and who still even to this day are so kind to me, 3500 miles away. 

 

I am writing to you because I want to see if my attachment, passion, or more accurately obsession for the Bills is normal. I feel like I love our team too much, to the point it hurts. There have been many times where I wished that I stopped being a Bills fan because it hurt too much. In fact, there was a week (during the Doug Whaley era) that I tried to psych myself into being a Denver Broncos fan because I was so tired of us losing and being disappointed - that only lasted for 30 minutes. I know deep inside that until I die, I will remain a Bills fan no matter what. But it hasn't been easy. 

 

This week has been surreal for me. I've never been so happy and proud of my Bills, as they excelled this year and gave me a sense of joy that I haven't felt since I was in elementary school. Yet I never been so petrified and anxious before a game as I have been the past 25 years. I want them to win so bad on Saturday, yet I am trying to be realistic and temper my expectations. I know that if we lose, I will be so disappointed that I am afraid how I will take it. If anyone has any words of encouragement should this happen, I would appreciate it. Is there anyone else that feels as I do, or am I the only one? 

 

You see, I've tried to understand the psychology, the inner depths, of why I like our team so much. I mean at the end of the day, it's a bunch of athletes in red, blue, and white uniforms who get paid a lot of money to play a kids game. They don't know me personally, they are rich, and have their own lives. I'm not even from Buffalo. Heck, every year new people come and go. I have a good job, have a loving family, and am healthy - I am grateful for the blessings in my life. But what is it about the Bills that causes me to pour out my heart and my soul? Why do they cause me to be so elated, yet so sad? Sometimes, I wonder what is wrong with me and what I can do to overcome my attachment to our team. My friends in California cannot figure out why I love our Bills so much. 

 

I've been wanting to share my thoughts with you but wasn't sure how this will be received. But I thought I had nothing to lose. I'd love to hear your thoughts. 

 

Thanks,

Thomas 

 

 

 

 

Amen brotha... you are officially addicted and a member of the #BillsMafia

[JDHillFan]

This line from the movie Fever Pitch has had me thinking ever since I saw it:

You love the Red Sox, but have they ever loved you back? 
 

No matter what happens tonight, this season feels like the Bills finally loved me back. AWESOME SEASON!!

 

https://www.quotes.net/mquote/31516

[SoCal Deek]

Born and raised in WNY. Attended games at the Rockpile, the first game and many more at Rich Stadium, two Super Bowls, and London too. Have lived in Southern California for decades but there’s nobody who knows me who doesn’t know of my fanaticism for the Bills.
 

I’m convinced that things are indeed finally building again at OBD so last weeks playoff win makes me feel we’re playing with House money tonight having gotten over yet another hurdle. It’s the same way I felt once we broke through the drought on that infamous New Year’s Eve a few years back. 
 

Go Bills

[KellyToTasker]

10 hours ago, Rockee96 said:

Hi,

 

I am a 39-year old from California who has been a die-hard Bills fan for the past 30 years. It all started when my mother bought me a Thurman Thomas rookie card for my 9th birthday in 1990. I started watching Bills games rooting for Thurman because I wanted the value of the card to go up. The rest is history, as I fell in love with the team, witnessed Wide Right, the Super Bowls, the heartbreak of Music City Miracle, short-lived joys, and long-suffering during the past 3 decades. I've flown to Buffalo from Cali to watch Bills home games only to see them lose over and over until I finally witnessed a win in 2018 (when Josh beat the Titans). I've met great friends during the tailgates who welcomed me with open arms and who still even to this day are so kind to me, 3500 miles away. 

 

I am writing to you because I want to see if my attachment, passion, or more accurately obsession for the Bills is normal. I feel like I love our team too much, to the point it hurts. There have been many times where I wished that I stopped being a Bills fan because it hurt too much. In fact, there was a week (during the Doug Whaley era) that I tried to psych myself into being a Denver Broncos fan because I was so tired of us losing and being disappointed - that only lasted for 30 minutes. I know deep inside that until I die, I will remain a Bills fan no matter what. But it hasn't been easy. 

 

This week has been surreal for me. I've never been so happy and proud of my Bills, as they excelled this year and gave me a sense of joy that I haven't felt since I was in elementary school. Yet I never been so petrified and anxious before a game as I have been the past 25 years. I want them to win so bad on Saturday, yet I am trying to be realistic and temper my expectations. I know that if we lose, I will be so disappointed that I am afraid how I will take it. If anyone has any words of encouragement should this happen, I would appreciate it. Is there anyone else that feels as I do, or am I the only one? 

 

You see, I've tried to understand the psychology, the inner depths, of why I like our team so much. I mean at the end of the day, it's a bunch of athletes in red, blue, and white uniforms who get paid a lot of money to play a kids game. They don't know me personally, they are rich, and have their own lives. I'm not even from Buffalo. Heck, every year new people come and go. I have a good job, have a loving family, and am healthy - I am grateful for the blessings in my life. But what is it about the Bills that causes me to pour out my heart and my soul? Why do they cause me to be so elated, yet so sad? Sometimes, I wonder what is wrong with me and what I can do to overcome my attachment to our team. My friends in California cannot figure out why I love our Bills so much. 

 

I've been wanting to share my thoughts with you but wasn't sure how this will be received. But I thought I had nothing to lose. I'd love to hear your thoughts. 

 

Thanks,

Thomas 

 

 

Okay, change your name to mine, a couple of small points, and you’re expressing my life, my story. Also 39, admittedly, I love the Bills much more than somebody should. But I do. And frankly, I don’t care what the optics are to others.
 

This year is different and people are noticing. As of late, I have friends from all over the country, saying, “Hey, because of you, I’m a Bills fan for the rest of the season. I want them to win it....For you.”

[BigDingus]

All I can say is I've feel the same way, down to the stressors and trying to psych myself out of being so passionate about the Bills at times (after the Cowboys MNF loss years ago, I wanted so bad to hate this team but couldn't). 

So no, you're not alone. Just try not to get worked up if we lose. I know it's easier said than done, but at the end of the day, it's just football. The Bills have historically had some really s*** luck, and if it happens again, just chalk it up to being a Bills fan. It almost seems like it wouldn't be the Bills if they became a front-runner, SB winning team all of a sudden 🤣

[wjag]

Older than most on here.  Grew up in Hamburg.  Job moved me to New Jersey and then to Maryland after college.  Was a season ticket holder during the great run of the late 80s and the early 90s.  Drove in for every game over a five year period.  Did not miss a game in five years.  First from Jersey, then from Maryland.  Everyone who knew me in Jersey and knows me in Maryland knows I am a "Buffalo" native and a Sabres and Bills fan, through and through.  But I am a Buffalo, the city, fan first and foremost.  I went to high school in South Buffalo which meant I was riding a metro bus back and forth each day. 

 

I meet lots of Bills fans in my travels and one of the themes that is most common amongst us expats is a reverence we hold for WNY.  It's hard to describe, but having grown up there it literally is in our blood, part of our DNA.  I keep a second home a few miles from the Rich Stadium (it will always be Rich stadium to me, the place I saw my first football game, the Rolling Stones, and the great runs of the K-Gun offense) and get back to the area frequently as both my wife and I have significant family still there.  When the Bills are doing good, I like to talk about them.  When the Bills are doing bad, I literally abstain from all internet.  While I get it works for some, I have no interest in dwelling on the bad or tearing down the team or player.  I work very hard to keep my written thoughts positive.  

 

I am absolutely envious of Boston, Pittsburgh, Dallas and places like that.  Those fans do not know how lucky they have it.  If one of their sport franchises is losing, it's likely they have another that will bring home a championship.  What makes us Buffalo fans one of the greatest fan bases is we have not known glory.  Our mooted celebrations are for wide right and no goal.   We don't have a history of excellence.  We do have a history of heartache.  And yet hope springs eternal and we root on our team and our city.

 

I am not prepared for this season to be over at midnight tonight.  I genuinely believe this team has something very special going on.  The Ravens will get their pound of flesh tonight, but they are leaving to clean out their lockers tomorrow.  Josh and Cole and Stefon and Dion and Matt, and Jordan and Micah and Tre and Mario and and and will find a way.

 

Go Bills!!!

[YoloinOhio]

My advice is to treat sports as a fun diversion from reality. It is perfectly normal to feel depressed if your favorite team loses. It’s ok to be emotionally invested. That’s pretty much aligned to being a true fan. In this particular case, the Bills have checked every box that imo they needed to move forward in a successful manner. They really exceeded that in some areas. No matter what happens in this game, try to enjoy watching this team. It’s one of the best we have seen. And know that we have our franchise QB, HC, GM in place. Losing to the Ravens would be losing to a great team. That happens in the playoffs. Our QB is a 24 year old superstar. They will be back. They just keep taking steps. 

[Pine Barrens Mafia]

I'm repeatedly told to be quiet during games by the missus. It never happens.

[D. L. Hot-Flamethrower]

Fan since the early 70s, my Dad was an old AFL/Bills fan, and I loved OJ-he was my hero. I've seen alot of of ups and downs being a fan. Most peole would probably say I'm pretty emotionally controlled in my real life. In my Bills life that all changes. My 2 adult kids watch the games with me and are almost as emotionally charged. I'll probably never be able to completely remove the emotion-but a Super Bowl win would help!🤭

[T master]

11 hours ago, Rockee96 said:

Hi,

 

I am a 39-year old from California who has been a die-hard Bills fan for the past 30 years. It all started when my mother bought me a Thurman Thomas rookie card for my 9th birthday in 1990. I started watching Bills games rooting for Thurman because I wanted the value of the card to go up. The rest is history, as I fell in love with the team, witnessed Wide Right, the Super Bowls, the heartbreak of Music City Miracle, short-lived joys, and long-suffering during the past 3 decades. I've flown to Buffalo from Cali to watch Bills home games only to see them lose over and over until I finally witnessed a win in 2018 (when Josh beat the Titans). I've met great friends during the tailgates who welcomed me with open arms and who still even to this day are so kind to me, 3500 miles away. 

 

I am writing to you because I want to see if my attachment, passion, or more accurately obsession for the Bills is normal. I feel like I love our team too much, to the point it hurts. There have been many times where I wished that I stopped being a Bills fan because it hurt too much. In fact, there was a week (during the Doug Whaley era) that I tried to psych myself into being a Denver Broncos fan because I was so tired of us losing and being disappointed - that only lasted for 30 minutes. I know deep inside that until I die, I will remain a Bills fan no matter what. But it hasn't been easy. 

 

This week has been surreal for me. I've never been so happy and proud of my Bills, as they excelled this year and gave me a sense of joy that I haven't felt since I was in elementary school. Yet I never been so petrified and anxious before a game as I have been the past 25 years. I want them to win so bad on Saturday, yet I am trying to be realistic and temper my expectations. I know that if we lose, I will be so disappointed that I am afraid how I will take it. If anyone has any words of encouragement should this happen, I would appreciate it. Is there anyone else that feels as I do, or am I the only one? 

 

You see, I've tried to understand the psychology, the inner depths, of why I like our team so much. I mean at the end of the day, it's a bunch of athletes in red, blue, and white uniforms who get paid a lot of money to play a kids game. They don't know me personally, they are rich, and have their own lives. I'm not even from Buffalo. Heck, every year new people come and go. I have a good job, have a loving family, and am healthy - I am grateful for the blessings in my life. But what is it about the Bills that causes me to pour out my heart and my soul? Why do they cause me to be so elated, yet so sad? Sometimes, I wonder what is wrong with me and what I can do to overcome my attachment to our team. My friends in California cannot figure out why I love our Bills so much. 

 

I've been wanting to share my thoughts with you but wasn't sure how this will be received. But I thought I had nothing to lose. I'd love to hear your thoughts. 

 

Thanks,

Thomas 

 

 

 

Well Thomas welcome ! That's just the way it is the Bills are the working mans crack and for the most part the Bills mafia are blue collar ball busting fans that bleed Red, White, & Blue once your hooked your there for life to experience all the highs & lows that come along with it .

 

Luckily for you you got in at the best time the team ever had even though they never won the big one which talk about the intro of being bi polar holy cow !! 

 

I am 59 and my Bills fandom started way back when the popular saying wen they played against the fins was 

Miami's got the oranges but we got the Juice" OJ was the man back then and he was every bit as exciting to watch as Thurm and alas we never really had great seasons back in those days .

 

if i have any advice just keep some anti depressants close (kidding of corse) but i believe being a Bills fan is why they party so much because it helps to curb some of the pain at times 🤔 or may even have caused a lot of addictions 😂 over the years .

 

I remember the first SB in Tampa decked out inBills gear head to toe in Davey Fl. at a friends house that just so happened to be a Giants fan i even had Bills socks on and was so confident that the SB was ours because we had beaten them earlier that season 🤔 if my memory serves me right but we all know what happened .

 

But i think this team has the potential to give todays Bills what the 90's Bills despite all the talent back then could not seem to grab the Lombardi !! 

 

But i do have a bottle of Mescal laying around just incase and my Dr. has given me mood altering script just incase 😢😂🙄🙀😰😅 GO BILLS !!

[Whites Bay]

Grew up in Rochester watching the The Juice on a snowy, grainy black-and-white set.  Watched 10 years of futility against the Dolphins.  Thrilled at being at the Raiders AFC Championship Game, and the Greatest Comeback Game (almost left...but didn't...).  And endured the slights and humiliations of colleagues and co-workers who weren't even football fans as they stuck their heads into my office to ask "Hey, wha happened to your team AGAIN?!  HAHAHAHA!!!!" for four f*cking years in a row.  And then came the wilderness years, but we continued to buy season tickets.  Years of Donohoe, and Mularkey, and Jauron, and Gailey and Marrone.  Drinking the Kool-Aid as I pinned my hopes on players like Shaud Williams and Bennie Anderson and Trey Teague and Eddie Robinson and LEGIONS of anonymous cast-offs and retreads.  Watching our top draft choices fail because of horrible scouting or crap coaching, or leave the instant their rookie contracts expired.  Holding my breath for YEARS every time there was ANOTHER report on Ralph Wilson's deteriorating health.  And what's worse than THAT?  Infecting my two (now grown) daughters with the virus, and hearing their anguished pleas of "Dad, why did you DO this to us?", and knowing that they weren't joking.

 

And then came the end of the drought - sitting in a sports bar in Orange County with those two daughters as a miracle happened.  Not ashamed of crying in public in front of my girls over a stupid football team that had broken my heart for decade after decade after decade.  Then getting weird looks as I celebrated at a bar at a convention in Phoenix as the name "Josh Allen" was called at the Draft.  Hurdling linebackers.  Getting penalized for face-masking defensive tackles.  Mercilessly crushing past tormentors like the Seahawks, the Patriots*, the Steelers, the Dolphins.

 

I'll be okay if they lose tonight.  I don't need people pulling me off freeway overpasses the way I did 30 years ago.

 

But I know for a FACT that the Bills are back.  F*ck You.  The Bills are back.

[Buffalo03]

The real test will be if your wife tells you to make the choice....it's her or you can never watch a Bills game or show your Bills fandom again, which way are you picking? 

 

I've told my parents and friends numerous times, if I had a gf or wife that made me choose between her or the Bills, not gonna lie, I would tell her to pack her sh*t lol

[Beerball]

62 year old Bills fan here.  I'm really enjoying The Josh Years & hope they stretch out for another 18 years.  I've lived in California, Texas and now Ohio after growing up in WNY and the Bills never left me.  When they win their first SB I'll be the guy crying like a baby.

[BrainwashedBillsFan]

I’m right there with ya brother. A few years younger but been through all of it since the SB years. TBH I’m a lot less nervous for this weeks game. We got the proverbial money off our back, first playoff win since 1995. God forbid we lose this week...and I know this has been touched upon but we finally have our franchise QB for the next 15 years.  The thing is we are primed to win it all this year so let’s just do it now! Let’s go Buffalo!!!

[LewPort71]

32 minutes ago, Beerball said:

62 year old Bills fan here.  I'm really enjoying The Josh Years & hope they stretch out for another 18 years.  I've lived in California, Texas and now Ohio after growing up in WNY and the Bills never left me.  When they win their first SB I'll be the guy crying like a baby.

 

Bring plenty of Kleenex as there will be a bunch of us crying...Tears of joy !

[Shaw66]

Hey Rockee -

 

Great stuff you wrote.  Maybe I'll respond more fully sometime.   For now, I'll say this:

 

Is it normal?  For those who get it, yes.  For those who don't, no.  

 

The good news is that as you get older, it doesn't eat you up in quite the same way.   Three days ago I drove 400 miles to be in Buffalo to go to the game tonight.  The prospect of the game is always in the background, but the truth is that I haven't been thinking about it much at all.  I'll be completely wired in a few hours, but right now it isn't occupying my thoughts any more than the 400-mile drive I'll do tomorrow.  

 

There also are some great (?) things that happen along the way.  I live in Connecticut, and my kids grew up Bills fans.  In fact, the kid who lived next door to us became a Bills fan.  His daughter is three months old, and she has a Bills shirt.  Her ancestors came to Connecticut 300 years ago, and she's already a Bills fan.  How cool is that?

[Beerball]

37 minutes ago, Shaw66 said:

Hey Rockee -

 

Great stuff you wrote.  Maybe I'll respond more fully sometime.   For now, I'll say this:

 

Is it normal?  For those who get it, yes.  For those who don't, no.  

 

The good news is that as you get older, it doesn't eat you up in quite the same way.   Three days ago I drove 400 miles to be in Buffalo to go to the game tonight.  The prospect of the game is always in the background, but the truth is that I haven't been thinking about it much at all.  I'll be completely wired in a few hours, but right now it isn't occupying my thoughts any more than the 400-mile drive I'll do tomorrow.  

 

There also are some great (?) things that happen along the way.  I live in Connecticut, and my kids grew up Bills fans.  In fact, the kid who lived next door to us became a Bills fan.  His daughter is three months old, and she has a Bills shirt.  Her ancestors came to Connecticut 300 years ago, and she's already a Bills fan.  How cool is that?

Enjoy the game!!!

[Gugny]

50-year-old Bills fan, here.

 

Grew up in upstate NY (between Saratoga and Lake George).  Became a Bills fan on January 27, 1991 .... the day of their Super Bowl game vs. the Giants.

 

I've gone from homer to hater to borderline indifferent (Tyrod era) over the years.

 

I can't remember loving this team more than I do right now.  I practically wake up with butterflies in my stomach on game day.  Today is brutal.  My stomach is in knots and I still have another 7 hours to wait.

 

Being a Bills fan has made me angry and made me cry tears of joy (last week).  Being a Bills fan has also brought me friendships from all over that I otherwise would not have had.

 

Winning a Super Bowl will bring me to my knees and once we win just one ... I'll feel like I've gotten everything I can get out of being a fan of this team.

 

GO BEELS!!!

[chaccof]

14 hours ago, Rockee96 said:

Hi,

 

I am a 39-year old from California who has been a die-hard Bills fan for the past 30 years. It all started when my mother bought me a Thurman Thomas rookie card for my 9th birthday in 1990. I started watching Bills games rooting for Thurman because I wanted the value of the card to go up. The rest is history, as I fell in love with the team, witnessed Wide Right, the Super Bowls, the heartbreak of Music City Miracle, short-lived joys, and long-suffering during the past 3 decades. I've flown to Buffalo from Cali to watch Bills home games only to see them lose over and over until I finally witnessed a win in 2018 (when Josh beat the Titans). I've met great friends during the tailgates who welcomed me with open arms and who still even to this day are so kind to me, 3500 miles away. 

 

I am writing to you because I want to see if my attachment, passion, or more accurately obsession for the Bills is normal. I feel like I love our team too much, to the point it hurts. There have been many times where I wished that I stopped being a Bills fan because it hurt too much. In fact, there was a week (during the Doug Whaley era) that I tried to psych myself into being a Denver Broncos fan because I was so tired of us losing and being disappointed - that only lasted for 30 minutes. I know deep inside that until I die, I will remain a Bills fan no matter what. But it hasn't been easy. 

 

This week has been surreal for me. I've never been so happy and proud of my Bills, as they excelled this year and gave me a sense of joy that I haven't felt since I was in elementary school. Yet I never been so petrified and anxious before a game as I have been the past 25 years. I want them to win so bad on Saturday, yet I am trying to be realistic and temper my expectations. I know that if we lose, I will be so disappointed that I am afraid how I will take it. If anyone has any words of encouragement should this happen, I would appreciate it. Is there anyone else that feels as I do, or am I the only one? 

 

You see, I've tried to understand the psychology, the inner depths, of why I like our team so much. I mean at the end of the day, it's a bunch of athletes in red, blue, and white uniforms who get paid a lot of money to play a kids game. They don't know me personally, they are rich, and have their own lives. I'm not even from Buffalo. Heck, every year new people come and go. I have a good job, have a loving family, and am healthy - I am grateful for the blessings in my life. But what is it about the Bills that causes me to pour out my heart and my soul? Why do they cause me to be so elated, yet so sad? Sometimes, I wonder what is wrong with me and what I can do to overcome my attachment to our team. My friends in California cannot figure out why I love our Bills so much. 

 

I've been wanting to share my thoughts with you but wasn't sure how this will be received. But I thought I had nothing to lose. I'd love to hear your thoughts. 

 

Thanks,

Thomas 

 

 

You unfortunately have a very bad case of Bills fever.....the next couple of years could be the payoff though.  As I read your post the only odd thing to me was that you were not from WNY.  I realize there are Bills fans who didn't grow up in WNY v. teams like Dallas and Pittsburgh and others that have fans everywhere.  My experience has been that 90% of the time I've met someone who is a Bills fan (identified by a piece of Bills clothing or hat) they have a direct connection to WNY.  

[Nextmanup]

4 hours ago, JDHillFan said:

This line from the movie Fever Pitch has had me thinking ever since I saw it:

You love the Red Sox, but have they ever loved you back? 
 

No matter what happens tonight, this season feels like the Bills finally loved me back. AWESOME SEASON!!

 

https://www.quotes.net/mquote/31516

As a life-long Red Sox fan, I can say that yes, the Red Sox have loved us back!  

 

It started right around the time they changed from a racist, Mickey Mouse organization into a smart, competent one and started hiring good baseball players, good managers, and had a total commitment to winning.

 

I agree it feels like the Bills have loved us back the last few years actually.

 

This feeling hasn't been anywhere near this franchise for 25+ years.

 

 

PS:  I didn't know people like the OP and others contributing here existed! 

 

I always assume all Bills fans are native WNYers because, for the most part, why would anyone choose the Bills if they didn't have to?

 

Not joking.

 

Very enlightening thread.