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Crazy Things You've Seen


Gugny

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This morning, on I-787S near Albany, NY, I saw a groundhog sitting atop a chain link fence.

 

I am 100% certain it was a groundhog.  Who knew those little bastards could climb fences???

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A somersaulting cow qualify?  Out running on a road years ago, a herd of cows started paralleling my course through the field they were in.  The lead cow was so intent on watching me, she missed seeing the snow fence across her path.  It was loose enough that Bossy did a somersault / shoulder roll over it, and struggled to get back up on all fours.  The rest of the herd came to a confused 'parade rest' on the uncrossed side of the fence.  I just kept running, didn't want to try to explain to some farmer how I had caused a cow riot.

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7 hours ago, Ridgewaycynic2013 said:

A somersaulting cow qualify?  Out running on a road years ago, a herd of cows started paralleling my course through the field they were in.  The lead cow was so intent on watching me, she missed seeing the snow fence across her path.  It was loose enough that Bossy did a somersault / shoulder roll over it, and struggled to get back up on all fours.  The rest of the herd came to a confused 'parade rest' on the uncrossed side of the fence.  I just kept running, didn't want to try to explain to some farmer how I had caused a cow riot.

 

Yes. Yes that would qualify! 

 

When my son was in high school I found a can of orange spray paint in the back of his car. When I asked about it, he said he was with his friend the night before and it was Travis’ idea to go cow tipping. When they got there, the didn’t have the heart to hurt the cows, but Travis had some paint in his truck so they “decorated them” instead. 

 

I wanted to be mad at him, but I also wanted to know where the cows were so I could check out their “work”. Is cow graffiti a thing? 

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2 minutes ago, Augie said:

 

Yes. Yes that would qualify! 

 

When my son was in high school I found a can of orange spray paint in the back of his car. When I asked about it, he said he was with his friend the night before and it was Travis’ idea to go cow tipping. When they got there, the didn’t have the heart to hurt the cows, but Travis had some paint in his truck so they “decorated them” instead. 

 

I wanted to be mad at him, but I also wanted to know where the cows were so I could check out their “work”. Is cow graffiti a thing? 

It will be now.

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"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe.  Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion.  I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate.  All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.  Time to die." 

 

-Roy Batty

 

 

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Last year, driving back home from El Paso we saw thousands of dead rabbits littering the long desolate highway southwest of Roswell. For like 10 miles or so, it seemed like every rabbit in the region just committed Hari Kari. If you have ever driven through this area you know go little traffic there is. It was totally weird!

Edited by BUFFALOKIE
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11 hours ago, Gugny said:

This morning, on I-787S near Albany, NY, I saw a groundhog sitting atop a chain link fence.

 

I am 100% certain it was a groundhog.  Who knew those little bastards could climb fences???

 

No ####ing way!  Saw the EXACT SAME THING last Thursday in Michigan.  It's a conspiracy!  They're organizing (in an extremely random, disorganized way).

 

:beer:

 

 

'Cept the 1 in Michigan was atop a typical 3 wire fence around a farmer's field.

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Technically this doesn't qualify since it's my friends story, but it's pretty crazy. Sorry for the excessive length, but a shortened version wouldn't do it justice. 

 

I added another thing to my objects struck while driving to my “Karash” list. A giant freaking seagull! No kidding. Driving north on Wantagh parkway north from the Jones Beach circle, no other traffic. Giant seagull lands in the middle lane ahead of me, picks something up and starts flying away from me, but in the same direction. I am doing like 65 mph. I juke to the right, he does the same and,,....whammo! Big puff of feathers and goodbye to Mr. Livingston Seagull, or so I thought. I pull off at Sunrise, decide to stop at Wendy’s for a leak and a cheeseburger. Get out of the car, walk up along the passenger side, and..... this giant seagull head turns to look at me. I almost fell over. The ENTIRE seagull is stuffed a$$ first in my grill, is quite alive and moving its head all over.
 
Got my needs taken care of, including the cheeseburger, asked the people on line if they know anything about birds, then a lady follows me out. She is mortified, then laughing.
 
So I pull out onto Sunrise highway and start heading to the local bird sanctuary. The first light I pull in behind a guy, he does a double take, looks out his window and says, “Hey. there’s a bird on the front of your car!”. I reply, “Thanks, I know that.” He says, “its alive!!”. I say, “Yes, thanks, I know its alive”.
 
This stuff can only happen to me....
 
Now I see a little league baseball game. The umpire is so startled by my living hood ornament that he calls timeout, and the entire crowd plus both teams, come to gawk. I ask if anyone has a towel, since the bird bit me when I tried to pull it out. A lady gives me a towel, I wrap the bird, pull on it and,...thwock, out it comes. I wrapped it up and took it to a pet hospital, wrapped like a little beaked baby. They had mercy on me and just took the bird inside.
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Dust devils. I had seen a few when visiting Australia, especially around Ayers Rock (now Uluru). However, before moving to West Texas, I did not know how strong they could be.

Case 1 (which I had to observe): A 450 pound playground structure in our backyard; my son (about 5 at that time) and my father-in-law were playing close to it. The wind had not been remarkable (for West Texas standards, 10-20 mph appears normal). Suddenly, a dust devil lifts up the playground structure and moves it by about 6 feet. Very fortunately, neither my son nor my father-in-law were too close to be hit. The next day we anchored the structure with concrete.

Case 2 (which I did not observe personally): I returned from a one-week-conference; we had invited my mother-in-law for that time to look after the kids, as my wife is also working full-time. Upon my return, I saw that two of the three 12-ft-trees in our driveway were gone. My first reaction: Mother-in-law had another accident (she had totaled my wife's car on a previous visit) and mowed down the trees. However, all our cars were fine. Thus, a dust devil must have uprooted the two trees.

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You probably won’t believe this, but I’ve seen human beings jump off of RV’s onto tables that were ON FIRE! Apparently, the tables were supposed to break. Sometimes it was the people who broke. If I had a daughter, I would tell her that any guy who thought slamming you off a flaming table with the hopes of breaking you through the fire.....well, that guy is not marrying material. 

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7 minutes ago, Augie said:

You probably won’t believe this, but I’ve seen human beings jump off of RV’s onto tables that were ON FIRE! Apparently, the tables were supposed to break. Sometimes it was the people who broke. If I had a daughter, I would tell her that any guy who thought slamming you off a flaming table with the hopes of breaking you through the fire.....well, that guy is not marrying material. 

 

What if he wanted to drink liquor out of her ass crack?  Would he be the one?

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1 minute ago, Gugny said:

 

What if he wanted to drink liquor out of her ass crack?  Would he be the one?

 

Better than the other way around??? :sick: 

 

Have fun, and keep looking. 

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1 minute ago, Augie said:

 

Better than the other way around??? :sick: 

 

Have fun, and keep looking. 

 

These are the things Bills fans are known for.  Sigh.

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4 minutes ago, Gugny said:

 

These are the things Bills fans are known for.  Sigh.

 

Oh, don’t sell us short! That’s just barely “on the list”.  We are “special”! 

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